Friday, January 08, 2010

MAZEL TOV: YOU'RE NOT MY DOCTOR

In Portnoy's Complaint, Sophie was a hypochondriac-by-proxy for poor Alex.  Polio!!  Diarrhea from eating trafe!!  A cholerya!!  My mother wasn’t THAT bad, but she was a little paranoid about my health, and I caught it by osmosis.  You think you’d WANT to be my doctor for the steady income, but now I’m on Medicare and I feel guilty for taking a doctor’s time.  And hmmm, now that I think about it, my throat is a little scratchy.  Will it turn into pneumonia or just bronchitis?  Swine flu?  Even kosher flu?  Oh, consider the possibilities!
Because I have a little cold
I'll follow Linus P.;
I'll take his famous vitamin
And then just wait and C.


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